Just in time for the holiday season Oblivious Records is re releasing 1988’s most endearing Christmas album- The Rabid Mice Crash Christmas. The timeless collection of re-imagined Christmas favourites and all original tunes of dysfunctional seasonal merriment -from Edmonton’s forgotten retarded children of the 80’s Brad Ray , Myles Christiansen, and Cam Bennet- will leave you feeling like a Christmas turkey- a cold picked over carcass violated with Stove Top Stuffing.
Following in the footsteps of recent releases from AC DC and Gun n Roses, who both signed exclusive retail agreements with Wal-Mart and Best Buy respectively, The Rabid Mice have agreed to sell their un paralleled Recording of Christmas Buggery exclusively in Darky’s Pawn Shop, North America wide, on November 23 2008 . Select stores will be holding special midnight openings to celebrate the re-release -complete with drunken groping Santas and live appearances of the uncanny Rabid Mice tribute band, The Diarrheic Lemmings, at select locations. Given Darky’s Pawn Shops are always located in the heart of the any city’s sexiest districts, expect all 5 dollar hookers to wear Santa hats while offering rodent insertion specials.
Darky’s owner and namesake, Ray Darky, had this to say about the event, “With one convenient location, on 97 street on Edmonton Alberta, Darky’s Pawn Shop is at the forefront of many cultural revolutions and looks forward to a long and prosperous relationship with the Rabid Mice “
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For those unable to make it down to Darky’s Rabid Mice extravaganza, The Rabid Mice RE-Crash Christmas will be available for purchase and download from this site as of December 1 2008. There will be 3 separate packages available to fit any price range, each with exclusive bonus materials -only available here for a limited time
- The Lump of Coal Special. It includes all 14 Christmas songs for download plus 3 early 1986 demos: To Hell With…, Rabid Mice, Mary had a Little Lamb- $6.99
- The Cheap Chinese Knock-Off of the Present You Really Wanted. This includes all of the above, plus a hard copy of the CD and replicas of 3 early gig posters and a vile of mouse dropping from the restaurant Brad Ray worked at in 1985, mailed to your door no earlier than the day after Christmas- $15.99
- Santa’s Special Present Just for You…But Don’t Tell Your Parents. In addition to everything offered in the previous two packages, this also comes with a vinyl copy of the album with 2 brand new Rabid Mise* tracks recorded just for this release- ” Stephen Harper is a Fruit” and “Punk Rockers Today Require More Therapy”-$39.99
Right now, I know you are thinking “Oh My God, this is way too good to be true. There must be a catch?” and right you are right; There is a catch. If you pre-order in the next 24 hours we will throw in copy of Cam Bennet’s memoirs ” I Was Ozzy Osbourne Every Tuesday From 7:30 to 10:00- Confessions of a Karaoke King”
Act now! Supplies will be limited!
Here are a selection of of Rabid Reviews:
“This Album left me feeling dirty and violated. At least there is some truth in their advertising”- Ryan Altman Spin Magazine.
“It is like Bing Crosby’s corpse was re-animated and used in sick rituals, just in time for Christmas”- David Finche Rolling Stone.
“They kind of sound like Corrosion of Conformity, only lacking any sense of musical timing and melody.” Clint Puzio- Raptor Tattoo.
“This is the first album that will truly offend Secular Winter Festival celebrators as much as right wing Christian Traditionalists, welcome the Age of Moral Decay.” Jerry Fawell leader of the Moral Majority.
Track Listings:
- I Saw Daddy Blowing Santa Claus…Away
- Santa’s Dead!!!
- Frosty’s Little Secret
- Oh Come All Ye Wasted
- Jesus is a Mexican
- Daddy Turned Santa into the INS
- Santa is a Anti Semite
- We Three Kings
- Bang Your Head-rumpa-pum-pum
- I Asked Santa for Transformers and All I Got was this Crappy Go Bot
- White XXX-mas
- Snowballing Isn’t as Fun as it Sounds
- Pagan Winter Solstice Slam Dance Party
- The Mice Are Peeing in Your Eggnog While You Sleep
* Rabid Mise are not to be confused with The Rabid Mice. Rabid Mise are a separate unrelated entity formed by Lance Jacobs. For three gigs in 1989 Lance was the bassist after Myles was injured in an unfortunate pyrotechnic accident involving a can of hairspray.
